Juck’s Thoughts on Diamonds Are Forever

­ I’m in the process of watching every Bond movie, from the first to the most recent. I will be giving my thoughts on each film as I go along. Not many people have seen every Bond film, and so I feel that this should be an interesting journey. The franchise has been around for over  50 years for a reason. Let’s get started! Diamonds Are Forever Diamonds Are Forever throws Sean Connery back into the role of James Bond for one last time. Despite the fact that Connery was jaded with his involvement in the series by the time You Only Live Twice rolled around, he delivers a heck of a performance in this installment. The character of Bond is played in a way that is entirely refreshing. Connery returns with more charisma, more humor (actual humor), and more intrigue. His chemistry with his fellow actors is poignant. Over all, he delivers a fantastic Bond performance.

The soundtrack was also noticeably well-done, from the opening song to the orchestral pieces. More than anything, Diamonds Are Forever is an entertaining journey. This is largely due to its sense of humor. There is plenty of campiness in this installment in the Bond franchise. Allow me to delineate some of this campiness. At the beginning of the film, Bond is being searched by a henchman for concealed weapons. As the frisking henchman reaches into Bond’s suit sleeve, he recoils, mousetrap clamping down on his hand. Yes, Bond had a mousetrap in his suit sleeve. DAF-Gadget-Finger-Trap At another point in the film, Blofeld dresses in drag to escape undetected. Yes, that really happened. 7b-diamonds-are-forever-still The altercation between, inclusion of, and concept revolving around Bambi and Thumper was also ridiculous. Absolutely bonkers. But the main source of this film’s campiness was the two over-the-top goons. One is a fat Deadhead and the other is a living ventriloquist dummy. They are corny, poorly written, unfunny, and retentive of not a single redeeming quality. They’re like the Three Stooges except there are only two of them. The kind of foolishness that they bring to the film is unnecessary. There is an altercation in which one goon asks a doctor to inspect his wisdom teeth.While the doctor proceeds to do so, Goon #2 drops a scorpion down his shirt. The man then convulses and dies. What? They also go on to knock out Bond with an urn. Yes, an urn. And those are just a couple of examples. Tumblr_lj0t77hiIO1qzoulco1_500 Despite the campiness, there is some genuine good humor in the film. There is an instance where Bond climbs into a moon buggy and a man yells, “Get him out of that machine, it’s not a toy.” The funny thing is, the buggy looks like it was built by the Little Rascals. I got a good laugh out of that. Diamonds-Are-Forever-moon-buggy Diamonds Are Forever is a fun, lighthearted installment in the Bond series, complete with Bond staples like car chases and sleuthing spy work. The film sends off Sean Connery with free spirit and confidence. Although I didn’t find the Bond girl very interesting, and although the movie became relatively dull as it approached its third act, as have many Bond movies thus far, Diamonds Are Forever can be deemed a successful film in the franchise.

~Juck

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