The Top 10 Robbyisms of Wave Three Album Reviews

Those who read the album reviews that are posted here on Gamerscene know that none of them are complete without the opinion of my cousin Robert. There are occasions where Robby says something that is unintentionally hilarious. Now that we have 30 album reviews completed, I am going to dive into the most recent wave of 10 and pick the best Robbyisms. Let me know in the comments which Robbyism you find the most hilarious. This list was a blast to compile, and hopefully it’s even more of a blast to read. A fresh list of Robbyisms will be made at each increment of 10 album reviews. Let’s get started!

(the ranking of the Robbyisms are completely determined by my own personal opinion)

10. “Yo ho ho and away we go on a mellow voyage on the great blue sea.” – Robert on Phil Wickham’s Sailing On a Ship

Robert’s pirate jargon is on point. This comes as no surprise, as he is formally known as Robbie the One-Eyed Robber of the High Seas.

rob pirate

Notorious in Spain, Portugal, and Ethiopia.

9.“I first thought that On my Mind was about a murderer or something, but then Swoope started to rap about buying stuff. It is so confusing that it annoys me.” – Robert on Swoope’s On my Mind

8. “No, I do not want to hug ya and squeeze ya.” – Robert on the Cinematic Orchestra’s Channel 1 Suite

Robert’s harsh rejection of any hugging is hilarious. He shoots down the mere thought of it right away.

7. “ Jesus will always be there to help us get through our lives. Jesus Lord of Heaven reminds us of this, and helps us to remember to pray to him every day/night/both.” – Robert on Phil Wickham’s Jesus Lord of Heaven

Rob’s use of slashes is remarkable. 

6. “Believe me: being quiet, isolating yourself, and not caring about anything is a terrible way to live. I have a friend who is like that, and my buddies and I always try our hardest to change him.” – Robert on Skillet’s American Noise

Robert is basically Spider Man. He swings in to save the day with his super friends. 

5. “Page’s solo is heavy, loud, and obnoxious in the best way possible. If you hate it then you hate music.” – Robert on Led Zeppelin’s Dazed and Confused

CASE CLOSED.

4. “Sorry, no hably espanol, so I cannot understand anything being said in this song.” – Robert on Santana’s (Da Le) Yaleo

Rob’s Spanish error is completely forgivable because he tried.

3. Whenever that solo starts, I blast the song and play air-guitar, even if I am in the car! Of course, I still have a hand on the steering wheel. I’m not that stupid! – Robert on Pearl Jam’s Alive

Robert practices safe driving and busts out a mean air-guitar solo.

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A masterful solo on New Year’s Eve.

2. “You may find that screaming annoying, (like my mom) but that is what makes Chris a great singer.” – Robert on Chris Cornell’s Mission

Nuff said.

1. “Hold the phone…is that Cee-Lo I hear? Wait, why is there crap in a Santana song?” – Robert on Santana’s Do You Like the Way (featuring Lauryn Hill and Cee-Lo)

Robert straight up calls Cee-Lo crap. Not Cee-Lo’s music, not Cee-Lo’s voice. No, Rob calls Cee-Lo himself crap. And this is why I love Robert.

Let me know which Robbyism was your favorite! Thanks for reading! Request an album and support the album reviews, as Robby and I have no intentions of stopping them. Wave 3 has been completed. 

~Juck

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The Top 10 Robbyisms of Wave Two Album Reviews

Those who read the album reviews that are posted here on Gamerscene know that none of them are complete without the opinion of my cousin Robert. There are occasions where Robby says something that is unintentionally hilarious. Now that we have 20 album reviews completed, I am going to dive into the most recent wave of 10 and pick the best Robbyisms. Let me know in the comments which Robbyism you find the most hilarious. This list was a blast to compile, and hopefully it’s even more of a blast to read. A fresh list of Robbyisms will be made at each increment of 10 album reviews. Let’s get started!

(the ranking of the Robbyisms are completely determined by my own personal opinion)

10. “I can imagine square dancing to this song, followed by downing a nice glass of Cream Soda. Oh, you thought I was going to say beer? Beer is for yellerbellies! Yee haw!” – Robert on Johnny Cash’s I’m Movin’ On

The southern blood is strong in this one. Here is a picture of Robert eating gator, right in the heart of South Carolina.

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It’s actually a lamb chop. And it’s actually New Jersey. But this picture is still great.

9. “For you French noobs out there, Chaque Nouvelle Page means Each New Page. I am not fluent in French, even though I took it for 7 years (I blame teachers)” – Robert on Dub Inc’s Chaque Nouvelle Page

The fact that Robert takes accountability for his actions is admirable.

8.“Oh no. This song sounds too Arabic. It reminds me of every party my family and cousins go to, because all they do is blast Arabic music all night long. The parties get loud and annoying, especially since we cannot understand a dang word they are saying.” – Robert on Dub Inc’s Foudagh

Truth.

HABIBI! HABIBI!

All.

Night.

Long.

7. “If you ever have a bad day (I have had many of those days) and you need something to make your day better, then listen to this song. You can thank me later when your day brightens up like an emerging sunrise.” – Robert on Lydia’s Sleep Well

“An emerging sunrise.” Call him Robby Shakespeare.

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Pure sophistication. Graduating from top schools with so many degrees no one can count.

6. “To me, it seems that Ink is literally about getting tattoos. If I ever got a tattoo, I know that my dad would kick me out of the house.” – Robert on Coldplay’s Ink

I can totally envision Robert with a tattoo of a shark on his back. A shark with wings.

5. “I could imagine people marching to this song, or having it be a theme song for anything in life.” – Robert on Linkin Park’s Rebellion

Yes, that song can certainly fit with anything in life. Like cooking. Or a child’s ballet ensemble. Or a funeral.

4. “This song is pure poetry. Honestly, someone should give this guy a Nobel Prize or something.” – Robert on Rodriguez’s Rich Folks Hoax

Robert’s child-like enamor towards Sixto Rodriguez is captured in this very moment. It’s hilarious.

3. “Personal hygiene is important everyone, especially concerning your teeth. Make sure you brush 2-3 times daily, because you do not want to have a bad teeth. My parents regret it.” – Robert on Lorde’s White Teeth Teens

I will be sure not to show this post to his parents.

2. “I can imagine myself getting high  (that will never happen) and having a bunch of weird hallucinations to this song. As a side note: I am in no way promoting drugs to any of you. That stuff will mess up/end your life.” – Robert on Pink Floyd’s On the Run

Some vivid imagery is created by Robert as he urges the reader to stay off drugs. Robert seeing unicorns and dragons as he floats on a wave of yellow comes to mind.

1. “The world is filled with wonders, and this song reminds us that is it is okay to wonder about certain things in life. For all of our younger viewers out there, do not worry or wonder about sex. Trust me, you do not want to know about it until you have matured. For of all the mature viewers out there, please do not overdo it with the sex, like the Game of Thrones, and enjoy it responsibly.” – Robert on Rodriguez’s I Wonder

Robert takes a jab at wondering, sex, and Game of Thrones. Rob’s the sheriff and he doesn’t take any crap from anyone. Deal with it.

Let me know which Robbyism was your favorite! Thanks for reading! Request an album and support the album reviews, as Robby and I have no intentions of stopping them.

~Juck

The Top 10 Robbyisms of Wave One Album Reviews

Those who read the album reviews that are posted here on Gamerscene know that none of them are complete without the opinion of my cousin Robert. I value Robert’s opinions, as they are usually very logical. Usually. There are rare occasions where Robby says something that is unintentionally hilarious. Now that we have 10 album reviews completed, I finally have a reason to pick the best Robbyisms from all of the reviews published to date. Let me know in the comments which Robbyism you find the most hilarious. This list was a blast to compile, and hopefully it’s even more of a blast to read. A fresh list of Robbyisms will be made at each increment of 10 album reviews. Let’s get started!

(the ranking of the Robbyisms are completely determined by my own personal opinion)

10. “He seems very chipper when he sings, and the entire song has that bright feel to it.” – Robert on Dave Matthews Band’s Funny the Way It Is

Who the hell says ‘chipper?’ When Robby sent this review to me, I had to do a double take. Robert is not from the UK. His use of the word ‘chipper’ was out of left field. And that is why I love him.

9.”I can easily play this song for my family or friends, and we would all enjoy listening to it.” – Robert on Chris Isaak’s Goin’ Nowhere

Oh, this is a song you can play for your family?

Like the stance, like the sky, like the way you shake it.
You’re the kind of a girl that looks better naked.
You’re the kind of a girl I would say is goin’ nowhere.
You’re goin’ nowhere.

I wonder how your mother would like that one.

8. “This song is great when performed, well written, and I know I look dang good in Yellow!” – Robert on Coldplay’s Yellow

Robby does look dang good in Yellow.

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The wine is symbolic of Robert’s sophistication.

7. “Faint is just another great heavy song from the band, and if you do not like it then why the heck are you reading this review in the first place?” – Robert on Linkin Park’s Faint

Robert states the facts. Yet another reason why I love him.

6. “It seems that Eminem has a problem with female dogs.” – Robert on Eminem’s So Much Better

When Robert listened to his first Eminem album, we all witnessed him soak in rap culture. This is one of the moments in which Robert made an observation about hip hop.

5. “I do not and will never wear Knee Socks, but damn this song makes you want to get lucky.” – Robert on Arctic Monkeys’ Knee Socks

I have nothing to say about this statement. 

4. “If you need to shut someone up, play this song at max volume right in the person’s ear.” – Robert on Linkin Park’s Hit the Floor

Gamerscene is not responsible for any deafness or other related medical problems that may be contracted while viewing this blog or any media connected to it. Also, do not follow this advice. 

3. “Well if there was any song you would play when stapling something together it would be this one.” – Robert on Jack Johnson’s Staple it Together

This is a Robbyism to live by. I will absolutely play this song each and every time I staple something.

2. “Thanks once again for reading this review and HAIILLLL TO THE KING! HAIILL TO THE WORLD! Just remember our king will always be our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. God bless you all, Amen.” – Robert on Avenged Sevenfold’s Album Hail to the King

At the end of a review of Avenged Sevenfold’s Hail to the King, which begins with a track titled Shepherd of Fire and has an album cover featuring the Death Bat, Robert decided to bless everyone. This is yet ANOTHER reason why I love Robby.

1. “Ahhh…you’ve got to love when Dave sings about sex, because it is always funny and magical.” – Robert on Dave Matthews Band’s Crash Into Me

I died when I read this. Of the first batch of album reviews, this is undoubtedly the best Robbyism to date.

Let me know which Robbyism was your favorite. Thanks for reading! Request an album and support the album reviews, as Robby and I have no intentions of stopping them.

~Juck